When I first saw this image on tumblr, my mind was yelling "Oh yea! Exactly! Whoever made this is truly a genius!". That exactly my reason why I stay single. However, upon reading those number of reasons all over again, I paused for like a couple of minutes. YEA! These are true, so is that mean I'm gonna be alone forever? Well to make it clear, I'm not rushing, just a thought that popped into my head when I found this photo. Hell yea I'm not though sometimes I have to admit that I feel lonely but I always convince myself that I always have the time in the world when it comes to this matter so I don't have to rush things. Well actually maybe I'm prettying things up just to feel okay.
Some friends said that the reason why I always stay alone is simply because of the high standards that I imposed to myself, and yea of course I kept on disagreeing to that every time they bitch me about that.
Ten months to go I'm gonna be two decades living in this planet. But just recently, I've realized that maybe my friends are right. I'm not that really beautiful but there are some guys I know who likes me, the thing is I don't give myself a chance to know them because of these reasons: Some are not that really intelligent and creative, some are not really stable with their lives, I'm afraid that they have intimate obligations already and they just want to use me to fulfill their sexual desires, I'm afraid that I can't get over for a long time and blah blah.
And the ugly truth, those men who I like so much just want to fuck me and those sincere men are those people I find lesser. Whoa. I hate my standards. And I know this warped perspective was perpetuated by the media. Yea, hell yea. If I can just lower my standards and give chance to those people who are begging me to know them, maybe I'm happy right now.
I don't know but I'm having a hard time understanding myself.
I always impose to myself that I am an independent thinker when in fact I am not, really not because what people say have a really huge factor to me. If I am an independent thinker maybe I could just lower my standards and enjoy my freedom of choosing someone I really like.
I wanna get over with this and change but I'm really having a hard time. This is fucking difficult.
