I learned in college that impact of attention to females. Like I find it really weird because sometimes or most of the time, I tend to see other people's action as a product of getting the attention they desire. I would really sound hypocrite if I say, I don't like attention! I WANT IT! Let's deal with it, we love attention! Regardless of the gender we belong, we can't escape the fact that we fish for it.
But attention has different impact to women. We love to stand out and to feel beautiful at all times! Sometimes, we just love to look good in order to feel good BUT most of the time, we exert effort just to get noticed by men hoping to belong to them. Believe me, I've been friends with different types of women and I must say, most of them feels like they need to look beautiful in order to get the guys that they're eyeing for a long time. The truth is, I am one of them!! :)
I've been out of a relationship for almost three years now but I am happy. And I am just thankful that I had this early realization about relationships when I started having one. That is, we are born alone so we'll die alone. Therefore, having one could never ever satisfy you. I've been into different kinds of relationship and none of them made me really really happy to the point that I don't get sad anymore. So, the bottom line is, relationship is not the answer.
Now, since I don't have boyfriend for a long time, I thought I need to focus on myself like knowing my season in life, strengthening my relationship with God, getting more wisdom, exploring different things and making myself beautiful on the side. I've been happy doing these stuff but then, there were times when I felt left out and really really ugly. Like, I was asking myself why I don't have one when I know that I am more physically attractive than other women who are currently in a relationship. I started to ask God about it and really just couldn't stop to wonder why I was feeling that way. That made me think it was one of the enemy's trap! He wanted me to feel alone for me to look for a wrong person to satisfy my loneliness! So, I was fighting that feeling.
Then, I opened that thing to one of my new Christian girlfriends I got to meet during our Singles' retreat. She said that desire of being belong to someone else comes from God. He put that desire in everyone's heart especially for women. The moment she said that, I was totally amazed! Imagine, how hard I was pushing that thought away thinking that it was coming from the enemy?! And the things that she said was backed up by our Pastor on that day as well, during one of our retreat sessions. He stressed that "The desire for relationships is a God-given desire."
Now, if it's a God-given desire then what should we do to fulfill it? First, we should keep in mind that even if we belong to someone, that would never satisfy us. You see your parents together for a long time, right? Have you ever asked them if they never ever feel lonely the whole time they've been together? You see, relationship from the opposite sex is not the answer! Yes, it's so pleasurable hearing someone telling you how much he loves you and how beautiful you are BUT you would never ever feel complete! You would still find a hole in yourself that needs to be fill in.
And that is JESUS! :)
For in Christ lives all the fullness of God in a human body. So you also are complete through your union with Christ, who is the head over every ruler and authority.
Colossians 2:9-10
Jesus is everything! He loves us despite of who we are and what we are! Jesus doesn't mind of if we don't wear BB creme or the way we dress. He doesn't care if our hair looks bad. He accepts us of who we are and love us unconditionally! :)
Now, let's go back to the desire thing. I'd like to clarify that the desire is coming from God BUT the feeling of being left out or unattractive is not coming from Him, it is coming from the enemy. Enemy loves to point out our flaws and weaknesses, so we'll have reasons to hate God. So, whenever the enemy tells us how unattractive we are compare to other people, own it up and tell him that despite of those things, you are still God's princess and that HE loves you! :) Again, we should keep in mind that anything that has nothing to do with grace, goodness and love is not coming from God.
If you are reading this especially if you are a lady, you know exactly what I'm talking about here. I want you to know that YOU ARE LOVED! Regardless if you are in a relationship or not, don't feel alone, unattractive or left out! You are God's creative masterpiece and you are beautiful because you are God's princess. And it is not true that you don't belong to someone else because YOU BELONG TO JESUS!
If you still feel not special because you think no one cares for you, well, I just want to remind you that the Son of God died on the cross thousand years ago just for you to enjoy life. Now, tell me, is the guy you're eyeing for a long time can do the same thing for you?
You wouldn't understand what I mean unless you start following Jesus. Ladies, learn from the past.. Aren't you tired from dating unworthy men? Know your self-worth! You don't deserve someone that would hurt you again and treat you bad because someone died for you on the cross! All the things that I'm saying wouldn't make sense, SO start following Christ. You would never know where it will lead you. The true peace and completeness is all in Him. Let His grace transform you and renew your mind.
You don't believe that God can transform and renew your mind?
Read all the posts I've got here from oldest to present. :)
